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2004-10-01 - 10:00 p.m.

I've been writing and listening to Natacha Atlas. Earlier I let the dogs in the house which I'm not supposed to do (they're too big). When I put them out again, I reached up to draw the curtain and my hand brushed against a scorpion, knocking it to the floor! I did a tiny little freak out.

Tomorrow I'm supposed to go to a training but it's Saturday and I don't feel well and I need to take care of some stuff so I'm not going.

Two days ago the administration at the high school down the street from us picked up two handguns from students. Yesterday there was a mini-gang thing with parents jumping in after the volleyball game and someone had a revolver in our school parking lot. I don't know how I feel about all of it. Not really scared, surprisingly enough. It almost feels like business as usual. The people who make education law have no grasp of the reality of what schools are like. How is it possible to make success on standardized testing the primary focus when children are bringing weapons to school? If I were a student, I'd sure as hell be more worried about that than about passing some multiple-guess test.

But I'm too tired to be angry right now.

I was talking to the social worker today and she told me that, since she has to cover three different campuses, basically all she has time to do is put out the hottest burning fires - the emergencies. That is, if they happen on the day that she's at that particular campus. She said, "I feel really ineffective."

I talk about work too much.

Lila Downs is giving a free concert at Guadalupe Plaza tomorrow at 7 pm. Verona and I were going to go, but she found out that all the seating is reserved for senior citizens and that everyone else is recommended to go several hours early in order to get a decent spot. She knows how I am about crowds so we'll probably go to the Bijou and see that movie about how corporations are considered people under the law instead.

And we'll probably go to a bookstore.

I have yet another new doctor. I like her though. I had to "come out" to her which always feels a little weird ... like I'm making a big deal out of something that's not a big deal. She signed me up for all of these new tests. My other doctors have either said that my problems are either all in my head or else neurologically-based (kind of the same thing, huh?). This doctor, however, wants to run some other types of tests. For one thing, she thinks I may have a thyroid imbalance ... well, that's in my head, too. Maybe I should just trade in my head! Anyway, I have to have all of these tests run before my next appointment with her in December. Yuck.

I have been reading the Federalist Papers, getting ready to talk about them with the kids. I'm also reading Snow by Orhan Pamuk. I highly recommend it, though I haven't finished it yet. Verona has been reading all of the recently published political books, including the gigantic Bill Clinton bio.

Now I'm listening to Hakim and trying to dial-up again. I have GOT to get off the old-fashioned modem!


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